Why I Can't Give Myself Advice


I'm absolutely brilliant when it comes to solving everyone's problems and giving advice. It's a very special skill that I hold dear. My only problem with it is that I can't seem to give myself advice. I can usually fix my own problems but when it comes to romantic issues, I'm a mess. I know what I should do, but I'm emotionally invested and that usually leads to not trusting my instincts and second-guessing my initial assessments. Having said all that, I suck at giving myself advice.

Most times I find I need someone to reaffirm my suspicions. What does that mean? Oh, yeah, I need someone else to tell me what they think so that I can see how far off I am. This can be a royal pain, but it's a reality. I wish I could give myself advice and move on, but that's not how I'm wired. I've come to terms with that.

Another major reason I struggle to give myself advice is because I'm too heavily involved in the situation. The pleasant thing about advice giving is that I tend to not be directly impacted regardless of the turnout so I have a clear, calm and relaxed mind. I can easily assess the matter, come up with three possible explanations and solutions and be done. When I'm directly involved I tend to be emotional which means my assessing is harder. I am a very passionate person by nature so a calm approach doesn't exist. If I react on instinct alone, things tend to go awry. I need someone to balance out my emotions and get me to explain everything so that advice can come in that way.



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8 comments

  1. I think that a lot of people experience this. You always give out stellar advice, but then when it comes to yourself it takes a whole lot more to take a sep back and be able to become less involved. I think that people are a lot more unreasonable when it's themselves in the spotlight :') Xx Beth - www.bethparnaby.com

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  2. This happens to me pretty often too, I can't make decisions about my own life but I can dish out advice like no other. I think it's mainly because when it's my life, I'm in the middle of the issue, but with someone else's life, I have a bird's eye view of the whole issue. Great post topic!

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  3. I totally agree with this, I always give myself the worst advice even though if it was the same situation with someone else I'd say something completely different. Great post X

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  4. You should try journaling when you feel this way. It helps to get those thoughts on paper and out of your brain. Then you can more easily assess the situation. XX

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  5. I ALWAYS get told this! I'm so good at giving other's advice (even on the same things I'm going through) but can't give myself advice or take my own advice! I think a lot of people are like this too- weird isn't it?? X

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  6. This is so relatable and I get what you mean with being emotionally invested. Its the exact reason why counsellors can't counsel people they know, it just messes with your head. If only it was as simple to give ourselves the good advice we give to others!

    Pandora xo
    http://curiouslilpandora.blogspot.co.uk/

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  7. I am the kind of person who can not solve her problems, but with time I have learned what is holding me back from it and worked on it! It's no shame in asking someone so you can clarify the whole process in your mind. My suggestion work on your emotions and read about the stuff you feel stuck with! It helped me a lot. GIGI x

    http://www.bombshelldrawer.com/

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  8. I am the EXCATE same way! I can sympathize with others and give advice to my friends but when it comes to myself I am so impatient and indecisive lol

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